Life and other drugs…

(And by other drugs I mean happiness!)

Over the past couple of days I have been home, been to a wedding and spent time with my other half whilst having a zen moment in his garden. It made me realise that at the moment i’m not happy with my life, there are things I want to do and see and i’ve gotten to the stage where I want to be happy with my life, I want to feel as though i’m living it and not just going through the motions I think I should.

One such example of this is that I want to start a YouTube channel. Whether or not it would be any good I don’t know but how do I know if I don’t try? I’m just going to be forever wondering what would’ve, what could’ve happened?

However, its all very thinking this but the amount of guilt I feel at even thinking about doing something different than working with the children I currently work with is phenomenal. It shouldn’t feel that guilt provoking but it does and it stops me thinking about my happiness and my life. I guess i’ve realized over the weekend that what makes me happy and what I think I should be doing/should do are two different things…

 

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